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of Greater St. Louis
1905 S. Grand Blvd.
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Open Mind

Open Mind is a weekly column in which questions regarding mental health issues are answered by professionals.  Open Mind appears in many editions of the Suburban Journal and other newspapers in Missouri.  This is an archived column.  Click here to browse other archived topics.

Editor’s note: This is the second in a series to address mental health aspects of “Back To School” concerns. 

As children head back to school, relationships that may have waned during summer break are renewed. Peer pressures that dwindled during vacation rise again in the social setting of school. And while age-appropriate friendships are crucial for healthy emotional development, positive relationships with parents and other significant adults serve as the foundation of a child’s ongoing development.

Within these relationships with parents and adults, communication is one of the most crucial components. The skill of good communication generates outcomes such as increased knowledge, self-esteem, empathy, openness and accountability, positive changes in behavior, and overall improvements in relationships. Teens with authoritative parents (warm, firm, and accepting of their teens’ needs for psychological independence) are more successful in school, less anxious and depressed, and have higher self-esteem than teens without authoritative parents. When parents and children openly talk about drugs and sex, children have better self-control and develop more negative perceptions about these risky behaviors. Unfortunately, the effects of poor communication may not be seen immediately and become apparent only when situations reach a crisis level. Findings from surveys (some are listed below) indicate good communication between parents and children may be difficult when the topic creates some discomfort.

  • Parents are more likely to consider talks about sex, alcohol, drugs and violence as happening “regularly.” Their children, on the other hand, remember having these discussions “a couple of times.”
  • Sixty percent of 8-to-11 year olds and 56% of 12-to-15 year olds say they learn “a lot” from their mothers about issues like sex, alcohol, drugs and violence. Most youth turn to their mothers before their teachers and classes, fathers, the media, and friends.
  • Kids want to know more. Most children (62%) and teens (57%) wish they had more information about guns in school. Youth also want to know more about discrimination, puberty, homosexuality, and alcohol or drugs.
  • Parents need to initiate difficult conversations. Most (77%) of teenagers don’t talk to their parents about sexual health because they don’t know how to bring it up.

Want to initiate and improve communication with your teenager? Visit www.mentalhealth.samhsa.gov/15plus where you can learn about the “Make Time to Listen, Take Time to Talk” program. At this website, you can also click on the “Publications” button to access a wide range of mental health topics. If you have young children, call the Mental Health Association of Greater St. Louis at 314-773-1399 to request the free brochure “Children: What every child needs for good mental health.”

Education Department
Mental Health Association of Greater St. Louis
314-773-1399


Editor’s note: This is the first of three articles to address mental health aspects of “Back To School” concerns. 

The beginning of a new school year can be a stressful time for children, with new teachers and classmates, new routines and more schoolwork. This time can be particularly unnerving and overwhelming for children who are facing major transitions such as starting elementary school or entering middle school. As a parent, there are proactive steps you can take to support your child as s/he heads back to school. 

  • Express interest and enthusiasm about the start of the school year. If you are confident and excited, your child will be too.

  • If you have visited your child’s school already, you are one step ahead of the game. If not, take a walk around the school with your child and locate his or her classrooms, lunchroom, playground and restrooms. This will help keep your child from feeling lost on the first day.

  • Take time to listen to your child and discuss aspects of the new school year that he or she is worried about. Remember to let your child know it’s normal to feel nervous about the start of school. For parents of younger children, suggest that your child take a family photo or special object to school to make his or her surroundings more comfortable.

  • Spend time each day talking to your child about what happened in school. Give your child positive feedback about his or her new experiences.

  • Praise and encourage your child to become involved with school activities and try new things.

  • Attend school functions and stay involved in your child’s education. Children whose parents are more involved with their education have higher achievement, are better adjusted and are less likely to drop out of school.

  • Make a point to learn about how your child develops, not just physically, but socially and emotionally, as well. If you are aware of what’s typical behavior and thoughts for your child’s stage of life, you will be able to tell more readily when things may not be right.

Anxiety and stress about starting school is normal for a child and usually passes within the first few days or weeks. If your child continues to seem anxious or stressed, it may be time to seek help. Talk to your child’s pediatrician about what you can do as a parent. If problems persist, consider a referral to a trained and qualified mental health professional. 

Education Department
Mental Health Association of Greater St. Louis
314-773-1399


Want to see other Open Mind columns?  Click here for archive index.