I recently had to turn down a fantastic job offer because I was too fearful about the public speaking the position required. I’ve always disliked speaking to a group, but it wasn’t until now that I realize how this fear might really hold me back in my professional life. How can I go about getting help and what would it entail?

Fear of public speaking is a common social phobia. A phobia is an irrational fear that triggers intense anxiety, which leads people to avoid certain things or situations such as public speaking. This sometimes limits their social or professional lives as in your case. Many people who fear public speaking fear the scrutiny of their audience, being judged harshly, and making mistakes that lead to feelings of humiliation. Cognitive therapy is one form of treatment offered for this form of social anxiety. It is a mind-body approach that uses several techniques including cognitive restructuring. This involves helping a person to learn to identify negative thinking and restructure it into positive thinking. Another therapy approach is relaxation techniques and other skills to cope with physical responses to anxiety. For others, there is sometimes a need for more in depth exploration of underlying issues. This relational or psychodynamic approach could possibly lead to an exploration of issues such as unresolved grief, relationship conflicts or trauma.

Brenda J. Flynn, M.S.W.
121 Hunter Avenue #201
St. Louis, MO
314-727-4646

When you realized how your life-long dislike of public speaking kept you not only from accepting this interesting position but might also interfere with other opportunities, you showed insight into your situation and took the initial step towards getting help for your fear. The ability to make connections between a single problem and more widespread roadblocks and curiosity about our lives form the basis of psychotherapy.  Through self-examination we understand ourselves better and often find our terrors, sadness and anxiety relieved.

You will hear many different approaches to solving this problem. I believe that while medication and motivational programs address the surface symptoms associated with the fear of talking to groups, they don’t get at the elements within us that cause the discomfort. Unfortunately, those underlying, often hidden, emotions re-surface when we least expect. Psychotherapy can help you understand what happens when faced with speaking to a large group, why you dread these situations and how to feel more at ease in an uncomfortable environment. Ask people you know for referrals to trusted therapists. Or, you might call a local clinic to obtain the names of social workers, psychologists or physicians specializing in psychotherapy who can assist you in your exploration of your fear and help you get to a place where you need not turn down a fantastic job. Good Luck! 

Jane D. Wolfe, M.D.
314-863-3041

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